Disclaimer: The sarcastically insulting views of The Scout are not necessarily the views of the writer or the Wolfpack. If you think any of this is aimed at you….it probably is. I’m kinda’ creating an environment where I’m a friend first, an FPL colleague second….probably an entertainer third.
If I do offend anyone, I could apologise. Or maybe I’ll post multiple videos and tweets masquerading as an apology but never actually apologise at all – and come across like a bit of a tit in the process.
(PS: Don’t worry – ‘tit’ doesn’t mean the same thing in Bulgarian and I’d never say any of this to his face – so its fine.)
The Origins of the Wolfpack Scout…
I’m not going to bore you to death here. Back during lockdown, the game ‘Champ Man FPL’ was born. Being frank, this particular FPL player was an unknown face in the Twitterverse at the time – and I offered my services to that game as a ‘Scout’ – to build social engagement and promote the game. Thank f*ck that I did. If I hadn’t, I certainly wouldn’t be in the Wolfpack. I’d probably be on the verge of changing my profile picture to some random bird from the internet and tweeting ‘Is Trent good xx‘ to try and gain a few likes and followers. The Wolfpack snapped me up – and here we are. No catfishing for me. (What the hell is that all about….)
As my main role with ChampManFPL was team leaks, I should make it clear that I don’t have any insight into that for FPL and I commend the powers that be for changing the deadline to 90 minutes. I appreciate the fact we will have to go back to having to make decisions rather than gaining a Danny Ings haul thanks to a Rockstar leak… (sorry, James Linden, f*ck off….) The good ones like Rockstar (hero) will still be valued members of the community – and the fake ones….lets just say that they probably won’t notice that the deadline has moved and will carry on merrily not realising that everyone has already blocked them. Not the sharpest knives in the drawer…
What’s your ID?
I honestly couldn’t tell you what my ID is – though that is exactly what someone would say who was with their toddler at an indoor trampoline park when the game chose to launch. If I’d got a single digit ID, maybe I’d be shouting it from the rooftops too. My understanding is that the reason we want to get a low ID is so that its easier to remember.
@FPLWILSON has it nailed. Tweet your ID to literally every f*cking FPL account you can find – and then if you’re still worried that you might forget, stick it in your twitter bio. It’s 23 by the way, in case you were wondering.
Lets face it. We all love a good FPL competition. We’re a set of competitive geeks. There are fantastic competitions all over Twitter – and I’m certainly not going to shit on them. But how many people are willing to pretend they support other football teams in order to gain entry?
I don’t mean to target @FPLWILSON but he’s a Crystal Palace fan who is representing Derby in the EFL H2H League. I’ve seen @FPL_LiverGirl is the Millwall correspondent for the Championship Express – and our very own Welsh wizard in the Wolfpack @CorfFPL is playing in goal for Man Utd in eFPL – “I support both”. How many of you guys would sell out your football club to get into an FPL Competition? Just curious….
SOME BRIEF POINTS
- FPL got confused about Aston Villa’s Jota, right? How is he worth more than Trezeguet?
- Can anyone – anyone at all – explain to me what the purpose of a milestone tweet is? Anybody got anything? It’s the weirdest little circle-jerk I’ve ever seen in my life.
- Have Martin Dubravka’s hands fallen off? I can see no other justification for the pricing of Karl Darlow.
- FanTeam. The Hub. What are we going to be seeking a discount from next? I’d like to see 30% less threads. I’d pay for that.
- Luke Ayling could cost £1.5m in FPL and I wouldn’t buy him. He’s a shithouse. Have I made myself clear? And he looks like Clarkie.
- ….Just realised that I think I sent a milestone tweet out once…
I should apologise again for writing this without sending out a tweet first to check if anyone actually wanted me to write it. That’s the new thing to do, right? (I played football with Darren Anderton twice, if that changes anything) – or I could have done a whole thing as a thread. But in all seriousness, I hope you enjoyed reading it and took it for what its supposed to be. I can’t wait for the football to start so I can bombard you all with ‘save this tweet’ and ‘hot takes’. If you enjoyed it, great. If you didn’t, that’s fine. Let me know and I’ll target you next month.
THE SCOUT MUSED AND THEN ADDED…
“If we’re all tweeting each other like maniacs about FPL…and then we all start rambling ‘don’t listen to twitter’ – is anyone actually reading this or anything else that we write?”
Bollocks, if that’s the case – nobody’s read this anyway. Shame.